Jump to section
12 tips to advise your friends
How to receive advice gracefully
Why (and when) it’s important to help your friends
Common friendship problems (and how to fix them)
For Business
Products
Build leaders that accelerate team performance and engagement.
Drive productivity through sustained well-being and mental health for all employees with BetterUp Care™.
Solutions
Transform your business, starting with your sales leaders.
Foster a culture of inclusion and belonging.
Customers
See how innovative companies use BetterUp to build a thriving workforce.
Resources
Best practices, research, and tools to fuel individual and business growth.
View on-demand BetterUp events and learn about upcoming live discussions.
The latest insights and ideas for building a high-performing workplace.
Innovative research featured in peer-reviewed journals, press, and more.
Jump to section
12 tips to advise your friends
How to receive advice gracefully
Why (and when) it’s important to help your friends
Common friendship problems (and how to fix them)
Have you ever struggled to give your friends advice? Even if we truly care about them, sometimes we just don’t know what to say.
For example, if you meet up with a recently unemployed friend, they may ask your advice about what to do next.
Telling them, “Everything will be okay!” might seem like a logical place to start, but it might not be helpful. After that, you might be coming up blank. You know that you want to be a good friend and help them through this tough time since they would do the same for you. But what should you say?
Giving advice on friendship to friends or receiving it yourself is delicate. Whether it’s about romantic relationships, work drama, or friendship problems, guidance that’s too prescriptive can remove a person’s sense of choice. Similarly, advice that’s too blunt can be taken the wrong way and be downright ineffective.
Offering great advice is an important part of learning how to be a good friend. Here’s some of our best advice to support your closest friends.
There are many ways to offer advice, but not all are great. Sometimes, although you have good intentions, you don’t need to give advice. Or there’s something you should avoid when giving advice.
Either way, giving advice is empowering. Here are the dos and don'ts for giving the best friendship advice possible.
These tactics are valuable skills for all areas of your life. Working with a BetterUp coach can help you focus on your goals and take your social skills to the next level.
One day, you’ll be the friend in need, and you’ll depend on others for perspectives that will get you through the hard times. Here are some things to keep in mind while on the receiving end:
Look, we’re all busy. You have a career, family, and other obligations. But so do your friends. At some point, you have to make time to see them. Otherwise, they might not come to you when they need you most or feel like they can count on you.
True friendships involve stepping up for each other when times are tough. If you have a ride-or-die “bestie” in your life, they deserve to have you in their corner. Here are some signs that your best friend has earned your help:
You could be the best communicator in the world, but your friendship will still hit some bumps in the road. Here are some common issues, and how you might be able to fix them.
Your friend might have committed to something but didn’t follow through. This can breed resentment and distrust. To protect the friendship, kindly confront them about it. Here’s what you can say:
“Hey, you said you would come to my wedding. I’m a little upset you didn’t, but it’s okay. I just wanted to know why. Did I do something wrong?”
You might feel that you’re supporting them more than they’re supporting you. The best thing to do here is talk to them about it. For example:
“I love that you trust me and can talk to me. But I sometimes feel you don’t hear my problems too. Can we try balancing things out more?”
You made plans, set a time, and showed up. But your friend isn’t there and isn’t replying to your texts, and then you see them post about being somewhere else on social media.
If this doesn’t happen often, you can ask them about it next time you talk. But if it happens too much, you might want to leave the friendship. This kind of behavior is disrespectful to you and your time.
Remember, toxic friendships do exist. Consider cutting your friend off if they display these qualities:
True friends shouldn't make you feel bad for being who you are. Be aware of your mental health and the impact others close to you might be having. If you find spending time with someone is actively harming your mental health, they aren’t worth having around. It doesn’t matter if you’re childhood friends — you can make new friends who will value you.
If you need advice on letting go of a friendship, reach out to a true friend and use the tips above to listen thoughtfully.
Now that we’ve given you this advice on friendship, you’re well on your way. There are many things you can do to improve your friend's life. Support them no matter what, offer advice if they ask, and encourage them to be the best version of themselves. They’ve always had your back, so it’s time you had theirs.
Being supportive might not sound like a “skill,” but it can be learned. That’s why BetterUp helps clients improve their active listening, emotional intelligence, and communication skills. Together, we’ll make sure you’re ready to step up for your circle of friends.
Content Marketing Manager, ACC
Products
Solutions
Customers